Binge Eating

I suspect you are like me. There are certain foods that, once you start eating, you can’t stop. The old Pringles mantra comes to mind: “Once you pop, the fun don’t stop” (ironically enough I don’t really enjoy Pringles). In the spirit of binge eating, I humbly present my top ten foods that I simply cannot have 1 reasonable serving of.

10. Dumplings

Seriously. Can you eat just like 6 dumplings? Is that even possible? I treat them more like potato chips and just keep going.

9. Sushi

This is why any sushi that isn’t all you can eat is a bad (and expensive) idea. I mean who the fuck is full after 6 pieces of sushi?

8. Peanut Butter

Yeah I know. Gross. But I fucking love peanut butter. Me, a movie, a jar of peanut butter, and a spoon. Good times had by all.

7. Potato Chips

Have you ever started a large bag of chips and not finished it? Yeah, me neither.

6. Chicken Nuggets

McDonalds, is that a joke? 6 piece nuggets is a meal? That would have fed me when I was 3 years old. I once ate 40. They are delicious.

5. Fried Chicken

Yeah, I’m the asshole who orders the bucket. For me. No sharing. I don’t care if I pass out from a food coma right after. Those 12 pieces of chicken were worth it.

4. Bacon

            Do I really need to explain this one?

3. Popcorn

“Hey, I’ll share this popcorn with everyone and make it last the whole movie!” Fuck. No. My large popcorn is gone by the end of the previews.

2. Anything on the McDonalds value meal

McDouble. McChicken (or junior chicken if you’re Canadian). 4 piece nugget. Nothing is better than taking 15 bucks and mixing and matching. The haul is better than trick or treating.

1. Pizza

Nothing tops Pizza. I can’t share pizza. I can’t save Pizza. I have to eat it all. It’s the only way. 

Update

I guess it's been a little while since I last posted. My new year in Thailand was amazing, thanks mainly to some great friends and the warm weather. I would recommend to everybody to make the pilgrimage to Thailand at some point. The people are friendly, the food is awesome, the weather is warm, the parties are crazy, the beaches are white, and the water is clear. Is there anything more one could ask for? I think I'll post pictures at some point as well.

Because I live in China, I got to experience a second new year as well. The Chinese new year is the biggest holiday here, by far, and it was a lot of fun. Well, by fun I mean that it seemed like every man, woman, and child in Wuhan was involved in a city wide competition to see who could set off the most firecrackers and fireworks. Chinese legend (so my students tell me) has it that there is a monster that appears at the end of each year, and that the sound of the firecrackers scares it away. The result was that it sounded like I was in a war zone. Also, they obviously don't have any sort of firework safety restrictions, so it was commonplace to see fireworks launched from the side of the road or sometimes even out of windows. New years eve was amazing in that there were fireworks lighting up the sky from multiple directions, which was really cool to see.

Other than that, my life has been pretty mundane. I'm currently busy with applying to graduate school and applying for jobs (I'll decide later which of the two I want to do) for the fall, so cross your fingers. We are nearing the end of our term, so I have to make sure the kids are prepared for finals (they are because I'm an awesome teacher). I finally bought an iPod and registered at the gym. All in all my life now consists of a pretty smooth routine.

The only question now is when to break it.